Is AVATAR Really #1??

I always knew Cameron's Avatar was kind of overrated, but I'm definitely not one of those assholes that hold a grudge against the movie for it. I was blown away by the kind of technology that it had created and thought it deserved some recognition for it.


Maybe too much.


Now, I'm not trashing the movie itself, don't get me wrong. But the moment the movie started taking over some of my favorite movies of all time on charts is when my discormfort began.


And now, Avatar finally trumped Titanic, I heard. It's officially the top grossing film of all time.


Out of plain curiousity, I decided to check out the list:


1. Avatar 20th Century Fox $1,924,744,073 (2009)



2. Titanic Paramount Pictures/20th Century Fox $1,843,201,268 (1997)


3. The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King New Line Cinema $1,119,110,941 (2003)


4. Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest Walt Disney Pictures $1,066,179,725 (2006)


5. The Dark Knight Warner Bros. $1,001,921,825 (2008)


6. Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone Warner Bros. $974,733,550 (2001)


7. Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End Walt Disney Pictures $960,996,492 (2007)


8. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix Warner Bros. $938,212,738 (2007)


9. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince Warner Bros. $933,959,197 (2009)


10. The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers New Line Cinema $925,282,504 (2002)

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At first, I didn't question the chart's accurency. These guys are professionals. Surely they know their mathematics.
 
But then, I realized that due to the long-term effect of inflation, notably the significant increase of movie theatre ticket prices, the list unadjusted for inflation gives far more weight to more recent films.
 
According to Wikipedia: A film in 1910, given much lower ticket prices at that time, would have to sell close to 100 times as many tickets as a 2007 film in order for the two to have equal gross takings.
 
And surely I was right. Recently Hollywood.com's Paul Degarabedian took notice and reworked the numbers. And the result:
 

I apologize if you cannot see the letters. If you're curious, check it out at Hollywood.com.

 

Anyways, like I said, Avatar, coming in at #24, is nowhere close to the #1 spot, which is surprisingly taken by Gone With the Wind (1939).

 

 

 

Great job, Gone With the Wind. Your legacy as one the greatest movies of all time will be left untouched.

G.I.Joe: Rise of Cobra

.I just saw the movie G.I.Joe: Rise of Cobra, and here are by initial thoughts.



First of all, although I'm a girl, I grew up watching the original G.I.Joe animated series, and nostalgia is the only reason why I went to see this. I used to be a hardcore fan, so I have all the action figures and own the DVD of the series.


Anyways, here it goes.


Comparing to a lot of other pigshit Hollywood makes today, the story isn't that bad. Actually it sounds quite promising. It offers a lot of opportunities for awesome action scenes, and it's pretty straightforward for a wider audience to understand. The only problem is, it's not awesome. There are so many pointless action sequences that are thrown into so many random time slots. It's obviously "the Joe's beating the shit out of the Cobras" that we wanted in the first place, but they aren't so kick-ass.

The character development was kind of disappointing. I mean, the characters are so bland. All their lines are just countless catch phrases, and they don't mean anything. And I know a lot of dudes out there who are just hyped up to see Sienna Miller play the Baroness, but aside from her hot, skintight-leather-jumpsuit figure, she doesn't have that much to offer. The only cool characters I remeber from this movie are Storm Shadow, and that friend of Duke's whom I can't even remember the name of. Although Storm Shadow is working for Cobra, he kicks so much ass that I eventually ended up rooting for him.


Now, the biggest problem I have with this movie is the computer graphics. If you saw this movie, you probably know what I mean. It doesn't take a genius to look at this movie and realize the graphics were indeed horrible. Everything looks so artificial, synthetic, and green-screen-ish. The graphics don't enhance the movie, they just downgrade it. Especially at the ending, the graphics go totally nuts. Every single bit of the screen is emphasized, there is something constantly moving, but ultimately, there is no focus. It just looks like a big mess, and your eyes get tired after watching so many poorly computer generated shit blow up.

Finally, and I know this is just plain nitpicking, the title is sort of weird. It's called G.I.Joe: The Rise of Cobra, and Cobra's in it for like 30 seconds and he doesn't do anything. Well, before he turns into Commander Cobra, he's this weird demented soldier who was just fascinated by nanotechnology. But, whatever, it who the hell cares?


Overall, as a movie, G.I.Joe: The Rise of Cobra was barely passable, but still a bit enjoyable. If you watched the original animated series, this movie definitely brings back the nostalgia. I'm curious to see the Spill crew do a review on this movie, but if were to rate this movie, I'd give it a low rental, but just barely above Bullshit. Sure, it was pretty bad, but not as horrible as some other movies I've seen in my life. I plead you to not see this movie, but I know you won't listen, so where's the point of asking? :-P
 

Also, there's one shocker: the creepy doctor is played by Joseph Gordon-Levitt. You know, the guy from 500 Days of Summer? The guy who was nominated for a Golden Globes for his awesome performance? Personally, I was kinda shocked to hear that cuz the doctor was one of the least-favorite, over-acted characters in this movie. I guess the actor just gave up after reading the script.

A Perfect Getaway

It was a gloomy, damp Saturday night, and what else was I supposed to do?



I went to the movies and noticed that I had only options. I had to watch were either this, or a weird Chinese documentary about Buddhist monks. Hmm, psychopathic killers, or monks...?


Anyways, as hesitant as I was, I was pretty damn bored, and anything that had any sort of entertainment value would have cheered me up.


It wasn't horrible. In fact, it wasn't bad. But it's not fantastic, let me tell you. It's not a Full Price.

 Now that I got that out of the way, let's continue.


So yeah, the plot is that honeymooners played by Steve Zahn and Milla Jovovich (whom you may notice from Resident Evil) go to a Hawaiian paradise, hoping the trip of their lifetimes. The perfect vacation spot they're headed for is isolated from the crowded islands which also makes it pretty challenging to get there. But it turns out that bloodthirsty murders are lurking in the depths of these forests, targeting couples.


Cliff and Cydney (the main characters) are stupid enough to go further and, on their way, they encounter some couples who appear to be very strange.

The script is very clever. It is completely capable of keeping the audience's attention, and makes you wonder what the hell is going to happen next. But for the way it was delivered, I really can't say the same thing. The story is very gripping, but some moments in the movie drag on forever.

However, the ending is kinda ridiculous. But I won't spoil it for you.


In my opinion, Steve Zahn was great in this movie. I'm not going to give away the twist at the ending, but it's pretty awesome.


The scenery in this movie is pretty spectacular, too. If you didn't go on a wild vacation this summer, consider this a sneak peek of what could've been like if you were actually there (well, besides the psychopathic murders).






What I'm doing right now is plain nitpicking, so don't be mad if you don't agree with me or anything.






All in all, this movie is pretty entertaining. The entire movie feels like a game of Clue; when you have no clue, it's really boring, but when you DO start getting some, it's pretty exhilirating. If I was a Spill crew, I'd give this somewhere in the realms of a Matinee, just because the ending is stupid.

If you have nothing to do, or just bored out of your mind, I'd recommend this to you.






7.9 stars out of 10

Once... I mean, One Week!

    Whoopsies, sorry for the mistake there. But in all honesty, I'm not the only one to blame. Those films are so much alike in their stories, characters, settings, and filmatography. They're both done by independant filmmakers, and they both have a rather simple storyline tackling human emotions and values of human life. If you've already seen one of those and didn't enjoy it, I wouldn't really recommend this to you.



    The story is the kind we all know: "What would you do if you only had one week to live?" We've heard it, seen it, and know that the main character, Ben in this case, is faced with a tremendous problem and now has a short period of time to live. Of course, he/she will go do something that's out of the norm, and at the end, learn to appreciate life.


    To be honest, that's all the movie is. I'm not going to apologize for not warning you with a spoilers' alert, because I honestly don't feel like you need one. After ten minutes in this movie, you'll figure out what's going to happen and where all the characters are going to end up.


    Nevertheless, this film is certainly an entertaining little flick.


    As a Canadian, I was pleasantly surprised by how beautifully they delivered the Canadian nature. Every single shot in the movie had Canada written all over it, and it was fun just looking at the pretty pictures when the plot was moving kind of slowly. Unlike "Once", the settings play a huge part in the story. The landscapes and rural towns are portrayed very realistically, and after watching the movie, you'll feel as if you've been on a trans-Canada tour. There's nothing flashy or flamboyant; everything you see defines Canada. "One Week" doesn't include numerous scenes in urban areas, like Vancouver and Toronto, but it just magnifies the mood the main character is in. I guess it's not that happy to be diagnosed with aggressive cancer, egh?

     Unfortunately, as I mentioned, the plot is extremely obvious and slow-moving. It's not that interesting and the characters are kind of shallow. There's an episode that happens to Ben while he's in Banff, and it's totally random and pointless, and it also makes his character less likeable. I wasn't also fond of Ben's pretentious fiance, especially how she didn't act properly after what Ben's done to her.


    The ending, as obvious as it was, was also not powerful enough. I'm still not sure if Ben lived or died, and it left me feeling vague and unsatisfied. Do I appreciate life more? I dunno. But then again, I'm just a rebellious teenager who ignores all lessons from life, aren't I?

    In conclusion, this movie had numerous minor flaws, and the plot itself comes off as being too much cliche. It really was just a beautiful slideshow of the Canadian landscape with some wonderful songs, but it's just not something worth your money. If you're a Canadian who's patriotic, I'd say go rent it. But otherwise, this borefest had me yawning constantly.

New Villian for New Batman Movie?

※ Okay, before you guys go apeshit, I have to say that I'm not a diehard fan of Batman, and I don't know any of the historical stuff. Please excuse me if my arguments make no sense.

I just recently rented and rewatched The Dark Knight, and it reminded me of how a movie, let alone a comicbook movie, should be done. It was dark, edgy, while entertaining the brain as well as the eyes. It's solid proof why people go nuts over a batsuit-wearing vigilante fighting a clown.

I never understood why people are betting loads of money on who the next Batman villian was gonna be, but yeah, I guess I am pretty curious, too.

Now, just to make clear, I never read the comics, seen the numerous movie adaptations and whatsoever. I am solemnly basing my opinion on Burton's Batman, Batman Returns, Batman: The Animated Series, Batman Begins, and of course, The Dark Knight.

I am a huge fan of Batman: The Animated Series, and there was one villian that was created only for the purpose of the show, and her name is Harley Quinn. I love her, we all do. Who can't? While serving as a wet dream for boys, Harley offered us girls hope that we can be just as deadly as we are hot. With her bubbly personality and skintight jumpsuit figure, she had us all debating whether we should switch sides to the Joker or not.

Now I know what you're probably saying. Are you kidding? That was a kids' show. That kind of flamboyant, costumey character can't possibly be on the next B-man movie.

And my argument is, if they could work with The Joker, Scarecrow, and Two-Face, chances are they could also work with Harley Quinn.

Now granted, Quinn is kind of an exaggerated character, but if you look at her backstory, that shit's kinda serious. She was an intern at Arkham Asylum who was then seduced by the Joker. And when she realized when the Joker was a victim himself, she went nuts and decided she would help him as his lover/sidekick.

I highly doubt that the Joker would be in the next movie, especially considering Ledger's death. So I thought, hey why don't we make her into an independant character? That, we'll get into later.

Another character that I had in mind was the Creeper. The pic above looks kind of exaggerated and silly, but he's kind of an underrated character, and there wasn't any good pic I could find.

Anyways, the backstory on this villian is that he started out as a reporter, Jack Ryder. One night, while filming a special on the Joker, the Joker appears and drops Ryder into the same pool of acid he was dropped into. Joker's special chemicals react with the toxic acid, upbringing the homicidal madman we know as the Creeper. After the Creeper goes on a rampage, Batman captures him and gives him an antidote patch, which only works if if stays on. Eventually, Jack Ryder ends up with an alter ego named the Creeper.

The only reason why I chose this guy is because of the special attention Christopher Nolan paid to the media's reaction in Batman Begins and The Dark Knight. It was interesting to see that the media responded to Batman's every single action, and I thought maybe, it would be appropriate to have a reporter as a villian, critisizing and exploiting Batman's every move.

Now, in the original animated series the character Jack Ryder was more anti-Joker than anti-Batman, but that's a minor detail we can adjust for the movie.

The plot I had in mind is, I gotta admit, pretty ridiculous and cliche, so please don't mock me for any of it, okay? It's all just a joke.

Jane Harley, starts out as Harvey Dent's character. Pretty straightforward and normal. She is young and energetic, and recently started working for Wayne Interprises. She is innovative and does well, so she is noticed by Lucius Fox. One day, while returning home, she is kidnapped and brutally physically abused (or if you want drama, raped) by a mob led by a casual mob leader called The Creeper (no yellow skin or anything like that). Because of the incident she is emotionally scarred, and is ordered by the Creeper to track down Batman.
The reason why the Creeper wants to spy on Batman is because he is Jack Ryder, a reporter for Gotham News, and is recently out on a rage to destroy and exploit Batman (because of a backstory I haven't considered yet, lol).
Jane is held in captivity for a week, then she makes her escape.
After that, Jane swears to track down all of the member of the mob and kill them brutally.
She also decides to kill Batman, believing that he also took a part in her humiliation.

Meanwhile, at Wayne Interprises, Lucius Fox informs Bruce Wayne that Jane Harley, an energetic newcomer who's shown progress, has been absent for a week. When she returns, Wayne meets her, and sees that she is hiding something. Charmed by her energetic personality and her dark secrets, he asks her out.

(To be continued)

Here's an episode of Batman: The Animated Series "Beware of The Creeper." It's kinda childish, but it's a hell lotta fun. Enjoy!!

500 Days of Summer

    I finally got a chance to take a break from all this lousy shit goin' on, so I decided to visit the theatres (sorry for the Canadian spelling, I know). Of course, they were playing the mega-billion dollar seller Cameron's Avatar, but they didn't have any tickets. So fuck Avatar.


    But, the thing was, I wasn't in the mood for high-flying, shit-blowing adventure. The weather was ridiculously cold, and I needed something my fragile, stressed-out mind can handle. So decided to catch a weeday morning matinee and watch 500 Days of Summer.


    And I gotta admit, what I saw was a friggin' masterpiece.

  

Ah yes, you'd expect, typical love story. Boy meets girl. Boy falls in love. Girl doesn't.

    This movie is not a love story. It's a story about love. And before you say "bullshit," I can reason why. 500 Days takes you on a heartwarming journey surrounding a couple, analyzing the differences of the ways men and women each take to approach a relationship.


    The plot is unravelled from the guy's point of view, Tom, played by Joseph Gordon-Levitt (sorry for any misspellings throughout this review. It's obvious I didn't proofread this). Who believes in match-made-in-heaven's, and thinks of the girl, Summer, played by Zooey Deschanel, as his true love. He doesn't have many unique characteristics, but he's just a humble guy we can all relate to.
   
    The girl, Summer, however, does not take relationships seriously. To her, being a "girlfriend" to anybody feels restricted. She does whatever she wants, goes whereever she goes, and doesn't look for any consequences. She believes that romance and true love is bullshit.

    To this point, it can sound like a pretty straightforward, cliche romantic comedy. But it's not. The movie itself is pretty light-hearted and humorous, but comedic moments are not in the spotlight: it's the characters.


    Guys can all agree they've dated girls like Summer at one point, and girls can all agree that they've dated guys like Tom.


    That's where the true power of the movie comes in.


    The story is so simple but dynamic that it pulls you in right away and helps you relate to the characters, through the up's and down's they go through.

    The movie's technique of reaching out to the audience is brilliant, with magnificent visuals and heartwarming sounds (the soundtrack is a feast to the ears). And the performances are great, too. I especially enjoyed Gordon-Levitt's performance, and how he put so much heart into an otherwise bland character. I gotta admit, his Golden Globe nomination is well-deserved. Deschanel's performance is just okay, but it sure is a long way from Yes Man and Surf's Up.

    I absolutely hate big-budget romantic comedy nowadays, with their intelligence-insulting, awkward sex jokes, penis jokes, and fart jokes. But this is one exception that stands out, by a mile. 500 Days of Summer is a beautiful film any way you look at it. It warms your heart, picks you up, and feeds you hope.


    Trust me when I say that if you haven't seen it, you're in for somethin' special.